At 24.....a girl

At 24,surprisingly the world for a girl-turning-women seems going up-side-down all of a sudden.From realising you are swiftly sliding away from teens and pacing ahead to 30's to racing up careers towards its' peak and a probable speed breaker-"marriage",It all clouds her darkly.At 24,when you hear your male counterparts,planning only their career rise and their future goals,roaming high head with their "GF's" (if they possess one),supporting their family and enjoying large with their gang,with pockets full and heart free,you see your own world shrinking.While groups expand for their friends getting married and new "mrs.friend" adding on,your group contracts before your eyes as your "miss.friend" going away.Even your pockets are full,your heart desiring freedom hardly things fall as you see and wish.You do everything they do,yet you don't do anything they do.One day you wake up to weird fine lines on your face so another day you don't understand your weight gain.To those rounds of phone calls that ring your house with same noisy question of when shall you get married to constant counselling or i should say "free counselling" that everyone no dies to provide you with as they care for you,as they would care for a guy once he is 27 or may be 28.People now look at you with questioning eyes and as if reading a tag on your forehead that reads "I AM SINGLE WANTING TO SETTLE DESPERATELY OHH PLEASE HELP ME OR I SHALL DROWN ".No matter the aspirations you sketch out in your mind and heart at this age,your "priorities" and world around you,plans it tight to slide it off your mind.Your shelf line began shorting and yes the never ending struggle enlarges to sustain your dreams.All this refers to a typical middle class girl with her own mind,dream and life, who now silently desires,wish she was a guy or may be years roll back,or just feel frustrated and prepare to struggle for "self" that she may win or may loose,but ultimately she realises .....her parents taught her as a child ....boys and girls are equal....but the reality is...."It's A MAN'S world"......

Summers then and now....

It's mid summer already and i can sense the heat well enough,the sun is shinning brighter than ever it does all year round and it seems it's in no mood to get clouded soon.Read in the newspapers few days back-Monsoon would enter India around 31st may from kerala,this year,that makes me get calculative that monsoons should knock "amchi mumbai" shores around june second week....and that does get me a faint smile like any other monsoon lover which faints instantly as i recall there are still sunny days to go of sweating and dehydrating one's self.For many in mumbai the summer loose their worth and meaning as soon as one is out of schools and guess that's same with the rest of India even.The school vacations,the long hours of play, play and sheer play,the love with mangoes (especially the raw ones),lemon juices,jal jeera drinks ....must have stayed a part of every child's life.Summers used to mean so much fun in your early childhood days and as one moves away from the childhood span the fun faints and faints a little more.Just of lately saw few little kids playing in a building's garden and that makes me go nostalgic about the days we had fun playing all day,sweating mad and bad and still wanting for more....it's weird,we sweated even then in summers...we sweat even now in summers....but those sweats were out of the fun had under the sun on the grounds all day....they never mattered or bothered and these ones .... are out of the struggle of commuting for work , that matters and indeed bothers a lot...gone are those days and so are those summers...a little envious of the little kids for whom summers should not end.....

WTH

WHAT THE HELL !!! one morning you get up like a routine one,to read in the papers "CA Nidhi Gupta throws herself off a 19 storey with her son,6 & daughter 3", after two days,again a morning,again a headline "The Nidhi Gupta case sees a new turn,husband & in-laws absent in claiming the body & performing last rituals,father blames,dowry death suspected",the next morning gets me a faint smile from the regular frown...."The escaped in-laws & husband,caught by police one by one",but today morning got me more than frowns "The Gupta's get a bail worth Rs.50K each"....WTH...& all this around..."The Woman's Day" !!
It really pains me to come across something like this,on one side the world celebrates woman's day,acknowledging the achievements of every woman around them & on another look we have this old man,the father of late nidhi,who is fighting for justice of his CA daughter.She was a CA that itself speaks of her sound state of mind & her intellect,but then my heart wonders , what made me her fall so weak that she choose to jump off with her innocent kids rather than fighting life?.Her father charged the husband & in-laws with dowry suppression & mental stress,depression in family as the cause of the death & the fact that the latter were absent from the last rituals & claiming of body itself makes a way for the father's charges.
I wonder how did a girl who was so educated fall prey to something so unjust.If the facts of the dowry suppression are true & fair,it's a shame to witness this in the society where now we claim,that India has modernized & no more you can witness dowry death's or torchers alike against women ...in atleast cities like Mumbai,Delhi blablabla..........
Here is a slap!! Just few days back,someone shot dead a young girl right before her college in the capital of our country,a suitcase is found on Sandhurst Road railway tracks of Mumbai,with a pregnant woman's body in it...What are we celebrating bloody...Woman's day or Week ???
How painful would have been the phase of Nidhi's life,where she choose to end it with her off springs rather than waiting for the days to change.I at times sit & wonder that she was "educated",could have opted to part out & be independent & gave herself & her kids a good life if things weren't going fine.But then another question comes blitzkrieg to my mind...are we really making best of our education?does it really get our minds the strength to stand for the right? are we out of that "puppet of the society " stuff ?,was she an idiot or just weak? & am afraid the answer is "No".
She would have been terribly helpless to decide something so painful.Giving suggestions here for me is easy wonder the state she was in.Sitting here commenting,thinking,wondering,questioning makes no sense,a daughter has anyways gone away...when the father must have given away an educated independent daughter with all his love & blessings to her new "life long companion",hardly would have he imagined,he at the end of his days would be fighting the judicial case of her young dead daughter against the life long companion who proved neither a "life long"... companion nor a mere ...."companion" .
All i can say is may the soul of her & her angel kids,at least rest in peace & the soul of her troubled parents on this earth win over those ruthless people who forced her to suicide or rather i should say...MURDERED HER....


But..i seriously wish ...every nidhi...FIGHTS...wish she fought...a little more....

Every great leader had a good TEACHER ...

Sitting in the classrooms,ragging teachers i never realized i had a liking for the profession.I have a faint memory of my childhood where with my friends i often played what we called "teacher-teacher",never realizing that fun of playing the role of a teacher as a child would make me someday fall in love with the profession itself.I don't know is it natural today in me to love the work of teaching or has it evolved gradually in me from liking the thing to loving it.I have been in teaching for around 6 years now,but it's lately i took it up as "a profession".It's lately i have realized that i am indeed in love with my work !!!.
It's not the money that this profession has to offer,neither it's the recognition i earn,nor it's the easy life that it allows but rather It's the fact of learning each day that i go through,it's the challenge of myself being tested each day by around 50 or more different "growing" minds & souls & equally wider opinions,it's the realization that "I can influence lives" & above all,it's the beautiful smiles & love & gratitude & satisfaction that returns to you at the end of almost each day of a good work :). It's not alone me making learn someone something everytime,it's even me learning a lot many things with each passing day.I believe there are very few professions that gift one with the psychological returns on a daily basis,to be more specific i would say the peace of mind & soul that people like me often hunt for.Work load here for me means spreading knowledge at a wider level.Indeed one of the noble professions :) i realize.If a person ever in his life had an opportunity to spend sometime with a group of nurturing minds & has made the fullest of it,all his life that experience would remain dear to his heart & i am lucky enough to be blessed with this opportunity each day.I guess this is what i often heard from people in my growing years till date - "job satisfaction".I may not have been earning in five digit figures often lately but i am indeed a more happier person today,a better human being.
Mr.Dhirubhai Ambani once said "your work is your product & the money you earn is the by-product,the one who values by-product over the product,someday feels disturbed & empty in his life" i can say i exactly know today what these words mean & that too very early in my life.Very few people opt for chasing their passion & dreams over the "by-product" & even fewer are lucky enough to get to do it.I guess today i well know what it meant when people said "make your passion your work or you would be forced to make your work your passion".I slightly remember the words of my grandpa who once told me a doha(phrase) from kabirji's work ( a famous poet ) that said "guru aur dev samne khade kaa ke laguu mein pay,dev to dev sachii mein hoye,yeh guru hi diye bataye", that means it's a good teacher who makes you realize the value of often many things unknown in life even the power of "the god".
Every great leader had a good teacher,today i know how true that was & how easily we forget the contribution of those great teachers to the lives of those great leaders.My sincere salute to all those teachers who have been good in their job :)they make a lot of difference often unknown to everyone :)
god bless

MUMBAI-A CITY VICTIM OF IT'S OWN SUCCESS..

"MUMBAI", a lot has been written & heard about this place & am no new to write on it,but for me writing this today here has a deeper meaning than what's been written about it till date.40 decades ago,this place then called "bombay" but just a land of fisheries was colonised by the britishers & i should say,it all began from there.When Americans went in for their independence from the britishers & the cotton trouble there began,it was "bombay" that became a "cotton trade king", when history built it's suez canal,it was "bombay" that became a "sea king" for exporters & importers, and that's how the money began flowing in this city.40 decades later this place is "India's economic center" with almost everything that's termed essential for an economic center of any country.With a population of around 13 million that is an approx population of Greece,this city would swell over 20 million by 2014,turning the most populated city in the world.When you talk about mumbai,how can you ignore "bollywood",that being the second most attractive reason that people come here.But for me,I have spent 20 years out of my 23 years of existence in this place & i proudly term myself "a true mumbaikar". I am certainly in love with the cosmopolitan society this place has, or the spirit of life that often outsiders claim to witness here,or the "queen's necklace" marine drive when the sunsets or for that matter even "the dabawallas" even acknowledged by The Forbes magazine with "the six sigma" the best rating of management.where else in this over-populated country you come across women so free, mumbai local trains are one of the best running system in the world & the only one to have trains running especially for women called "ladies special" ( that i love to travel in proudly ) & even Asia's first woman rail driver - Ms.Sunita Yadav.I am indeed in love with the beaches,the way people value time here and also with the not-to-forget monsoons-the mumbai rains:). From the warmth this city offers to the lovely rainy breeze & mild winter chills am in love with all that the list of which won't end and this city has to offer for my memory book in my mind.Every corner here & every mumbaikar you come across will get you a new story unread before.From Mc'Burger to vada pav,pav bhaji,pani puri,from sea link to vihar lake,from dadar market to shoppers stop one sees all to fit in the economic cadre one can.It's all beautiful but the coin has another side even,beauty has it's own cost,& this very place am in love with is also i feel a city victim of it's own success.A success that has either been taken for granted or misunderstood.
At times there are certain things in life that just happen & you can't avoid their presence but compromise.We mumbaikars compromise everyday,at times for the trains running late, at times for the over crowded ones, at times for working hours,or the monsoon water blocking our ways or at times for no social lives at all,but we compromise and move on.It's not a choice it's may be an enforcement.It's a vicious circle of the blame game that i don't see has an end easily.The reason am here after so many days writing this blog is 3 painful events that i witnessed last evening.Like any other mumbaikar,i too often travel & like many i too am short of options but to travel in mostly over crowded local trains that has a capacity of 7500 passengers at once but actually carries thrice of that number,excluding the self claimed heroes that travel on board of the trains,which itself clarifies the state it is when you travel in that.Nobody wants to but everybody has to.In any other place travelling 120 km a day could mean reaching an all new city but here that would surely mean you are well "roaming" in mumbai itself.My story of travelling in rush hours of locals could have sounded similar to any mumbaikar if you have heard alike one,but thanks to my profession i generally travel in non-rush hours,lucky in that sense,but am not new to the experience of travelling in rush hours though,Yesterday was a rare day of my week where i was to travel between 7 pm - 8.30 pm from Borivali to Mira Road.Well Borivali to Mira Road practically takes a maximum of 9 minutes by local trains but you would be paused to know it took me 90 minutes for the reason i chose to wait for a train i could manage to atleast stand inside in & not hang on it's doors.I waited from 7 pm to 8.30 to finally find a train i decided to enter into & these 90 minutes made me see something people either avoid or have no options but ignore.Many of you who have either been on stations or trains in these rush hours in mumbai must have uptill now guessed what i witnessed , it is a common scenario & not even new to me but it still manages to send shiver through my spine.
I witnessed 3 people dieing right before my eyes,their bodies crashed either wholly or partially.As simple it is to disregard the value of life in these english words in reality facing that isn't that simple.Previously even i have witnessed many such cases of rail crash in my life here,but yesterday i felt the cases were a little different.All the three-2 men , 1st between age group 16-20,2nd in his late 40's & the 3rd a woman possibly in her late 30's i felt invited their death.All were in rush,were in haste,chose the short cut & were may b forced to.I do understand,this place values time better than any other & that at times makes people take decisions which may cost them heavier than their imagination,but what i don't understand is what would anything fetch you if your not alive to even live it.There are times when things are genuinely urgent & at those moments behaving like those 3 did sounds justified but what remains a question is "who decides what's urgent?",it indeed has relative answer.
I really cannot judge if the reason behind the action of those 3 was a genuine urgency,or someone dashed them in their circumstance,but i certainly know one thing,what ever they were chasing would remain unchased forever.
Over 3500 people die each year in mumbai local train records & that's approx 1 every 10 days,somehow the human value has fallen in valuing the time & the task here.Our railway authorities no matter how much we blame them have did atleast a bit for us,let that be just ringing horns when the trains arrive or penalizing for crossing the rail tracks.At times it's we who choose to ignore certain facts & rules & may be run off safe & successful for decades but not valuing that even one failure can cost us all the success.
This city is beautiful & no doubt the economic center & the entertainment king attracts everyone,there is a bread for everyone here,but all this is worth till it's safe.All i can say is may god rest the soul of those i witnessed last evening in peace & give their families the strength to overcome the pain & us a moment to pause & think before endangering our lives & of all those whose lives are attached to ours.Things should be valued but not over limits & it's for us to decide the limits.I end this blog today with a hope that everyone reading this would take out a minute of their lives before creating a mistake that can neither be forgiven & nor be corrected.At times there is no second chance,so value the first & the one you have.I am sorry for a long article but thoughts just need to be expressed.
God bless.

LOVE HAS COME INDEED A LONG WAY..............

Love has surrounded this universe for a long time now & lately it has changed it’s meaning a lot.From “heer and ranjha” to “raj and simran” to “jack and rose” , it’s actually come a long way,the latest being “love – net “............
Anjana meets anjani on the super broadband connections & gets connected for quiet a few months .Thoughts shared , views liked , things exchanged , dreamz framed & then comes a “good-bye”.Months later………..a new anjana meets a new anjani and again a new anjani meets a new anjana & the song goes on.............
Years later,the new age Raj weds a Heer, and new age Simran weds a Jack , ohh well well well the confusion of this new love has left just two options with people around, either to get married to their own girlfriends or someone else’s ;) , it seems humourous but is actually a game of life where now love dsn’t mean bonding for ages,nor does it means commiting forever, ending and sacrificing their lives for each other.But this obviously expresses one side of today’s love , there is another as well , where love still means the most special feeling , the most pious one a human soul can xperience.These another set of people make the best use of broadband connections to stay connected as often their careers don’t allow them togetherness…………but this connection remains to their single soulmate……neither the soulmate changes nor does the love and nor does the bonding………it’s a matter of choice and few strikes of chances, along with the pinch of destiny that decides which round of people a person falls in……………..more of facebook frends then the real one’s , more of time spent on net then in gardens wonder who is to blame,is technology a burden or a light of hope in busy demanding darkness of life…..yet when I look around & I look back, it really seems funny to have this new “love-net” on the floor ……..but as they say “technology is the key to life”…………..alas it is true for everyone today………….unavoidable basic necessity of 2010 souls…………….

THE LUCKY ONES

Why does it happen that one sex of human species is always at a benefit as compared to another one? This question arises to my mind quiet often . How the so called “powerful” male gender enjoys so much while hardly giving anything in return,there always exist exceptions which undoubtly fall here too but very rare though almost nil. Right from the birth they have their mother to take complete care of them , to shower them with unconditional , uncomparable love, this lady, who even sacrifices her relationship with her husband , other than her physic , her sleeps , life, aspirations, dreamz almost all. Inspite of giving in so much this lady is the most neglected & taken for granted one by that same boy,yet she bestows him with all she has . These people are the same, who have sisters who cares for them,who at times even try to become good friends to their brothers ( under exceptional cases though they succed or the scenario can be different tooo), but in return these people over cover her all time in name of “being a brother” or “protecting her from evil eyes”. These are the same people , who will run for their lady like crazies, make her feel “most special” than she ever did, they would write to her, followed by gifts,cards,respect,care, & words , lots & lots of words…..words that change with times, respect, care that flies out of the window with time,gifts & cards whose frequencies go on falling… & reasons ……hello what are you talking about??? Reasons become unnecessary as time clock moves on, yet they receive best of love all life again unconditionally & above that without returning even.They are giften with daughters-angels of god,to whom they again gifts lot of love till she demands her life,her dreamz,her love,in the name of “guidance”, she is been held back by that same man.How weird is nature’s law, why do men enjoy so much of love- the lifeline for life , if they don’t even intend to return it equally? Forget about loving unconditionally all life, why can’t these people merely respect or care or stand by for lifetime unconditionally?? I feel jealous when I look at these people & the fact that these people are so much lucky to have mothers , sisters , wives , daughters …..to love them , obey them, care for them , respect them,mould them into super powers & the best part ‘unconditionally’ .In a very famous novel there is a line I can relate to as of now & that says “ a man’s accusing finger will always find a women” & sadly this is true most of the times. Wish god could understand how it feels to be a part of witnessing this & wish he hears me & change these people to become “the unconditional lovers” & we the kind they are atleast for some moments of my life……….